shards of End Of Year debris (it keeps happening)

A bit of time-traveling was necessary to post this blog, as it just didn’t fit with the rest of the politicised blogs of 09/12/2011, and it fitted better amongst the more self-pitying blogs around 29/12/2010. So, I have sent this blog back one year, for the sake of the continuity of the blog and also because I am ashamed to still be the wreck that I am from time to time; there seems to be an expectation to grow out of discontent, leave it in youth as we begin our professional lives – I have achieved neither. So, lets pretend that this is 2010 and not 2009

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I cannot see myself as a person who as done bad things. I know we are told to accept that it’s human to be bad/fo bad/accidentally hurt others, as we go through life, but I can’t abide myself doing this. I cannot cope if I know I have been incredibly selfish. I hate the feeling it gives me, knowing that my chosen actions may have hurt someone else.
It makes my life feel like something to get out of/escape from
Irrationality? Oh yes: here it comes again!

Also. If it’s just me and me only; totally alone to face a ‘Children of men’ style future, if that’s the most likely outcome, I don’t think I’d be able live.

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About John Ledger

A visual Artist, eternal meanderer and obsessive self-reflector by nature, who can’t help but try to interpret everything from within the tide of society. His works predominantly take the form of large scale ballpoint pen landscape drawings and map-making as social/psychological note-making. They are slowly-accumulating responses to crises inflicted upon the self in the perplexing, fearful, empty, and often personality-erasing human world.

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